When mesh goes wrong or “how I hid a small turkey in my pants”

I have come across a disturbing fashion trend that looks to have been brought on by the advance of mesh.

I am talking about the bizarre mesh pants that have a crotch that comes to just about knee level. They are not hard to miss. Just about any designer that is dabbling in mesh has kicked out a pair of these things and for the life of me, I don’t know why.

I mean, look at these pants in the photograph. It looks like I am carrying a sack of potatoes inside my pants, or worse. I am not even going to mention where they came from, because it would not be right to single anyone out. Besides, these are pretty tame compared to some that drop down to the knees.They are everywhere, usually modeled by a pouty mouthed elf girl with hips the size of a volkswagon.

Like plutonium, mesh is a wonderful tool until it falls into the wrong hands. All I can figure is that some designers decided that actually creating something that resembles actual pants with some style to them was way too tricky, so they just threw these things out and figured they would start a new trend. Typicaly though, fashion in SL tends to mimic fashion in the real world. I mean that was the idea of mesh, right? It was supposed to help us bring more realistic shape and flow to objects.

I searched far and wide to find anything in real life fashion trends that resembles these droopy drawers. I could find nothing. Even teenagers won’t wear these pants! I mean baggies they aren’t. Baggies sag form the top, not from the bottom. Any rapper, or gangsta wannabe can tell you this.

And speaking of rap.

I did FINALLY manage to find a real life fashion trend to match these pants. However, I had to go way, way back to the 80’s when hair was big, but the baggie  trousers where even bigger. They were knows as baggies, banana pants, parachute pants and …well, unless your name was MC Hammer or Vanilla Ice, you looked silly in them. In fact, if your name was MC Hammer or Vanilla Ice, you still looked silly.

That is where these pants came from, and do any of of us really want to go back there? No. Not even Vanilla Ice wants to go back there. You would not even catch MC Hammer himself in these things today. I am officially ranking this style right up there with bling and the mouth chew necklaces and will slip back into my comfy jeans. Meanwhile, here is “U Can’t Touch This”